Friday, August 8, 2008

One week home!

We have now been home one full week. Jet lag is going away as expected although Penny is doing much better than I who still gets up at 4 am or so....our household has changed some...I am going to have to figure out where the new piano goes, and how many times we will be driving to piano lesson. We live out in the country quite aways from a larger town where things are more available. For us to get Penny to piano lessons will be a 35 minute lessons the same...but hopefully several of the girls will be interested and all the class's would be about the same times...
The two little girls have reconnected, becoming best buddies again...Vicky has really struggled with a lot of things, she has had to work very hard the last few days figuring out that Penny has not come to our family to be only HER sister. Vicky had taken total control of Penny, sitting next to her in a fashion that made it impossible for anyone else to sit next to her, holding Penny's hand when walking, putting in only Chinese language movies so the two little ones would not want to share watching, on and on....we patiently explained that Penny and the other girls have to learn to know each other too. Last night Addie and Kate met me at the door and took me downstairs to talk. It was pitiful seeing their little faces with such great worry and disappointment on them saying "Vicky does not even love us anymore" they did not direct this to Penny not loving them it was to Vicky...Addie said "I told her hi and she would not even talk to me" and Kate jumping in saying Vicky won't play with us anymore or do anything with us and she won't let Penny play with us either" and Addie saying "yeah!"
So we went upstairs and all pleaded their case...and I said that the TV got shut off and time would be spent as four, not two. at least for the time i fixed supper. I know i cannot force relationships or play, but if times are guided then at least there is an aid.
The last few days it has been on my mind "when is this girl going to cry?" When we received her she was very much nervous, but no tears...they were there, but not flowing. Her behavior has been what I always hope for at say 2-3 months down the road...Very bashful, not used to hugs, not wanting to speak as unsure of the language, etc. No crying, no sad...but last night i typed on the translator, do you know what adoption means? and i am not sure how the translator spewed out the words, so we stumbled around for a long time...i was telling her it means she is for ever our daughter....we would always love her, care for her..on and on...well she appeared to become sad. Maybe some of the look was worried..but sad was finally there! We stopped and sat and ate, she picked at her food as she had all then our saving Grace, Eliana was called on the phone and I explained to her what had been going on with our conversation earlier and so Elaina talked at great length to her....Yes she understood adoption yes she understood we love her and she will love us, and then she told Eliana she was missing her people and house in China. She about this time did have tears streaming down her face. It ended up that at 8:45 pm Claude and four little girls piled in the van and drove and hour and 20 minutes south to pick up Eliana for the weekend. Yeah! She is going to be able to give Penny some conversation and also help get out some questions and answers to help Penny a bit.

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